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The Stereotypical New Year’s Resolution Post

She slimed meI’ve jumped into the stereotypical slop of the new year. I have it hanging all over me, like the coagulating goop from a Nickolodeon game show. So while I’m sitting here reveling in my ooey-gooey goodness, I figured I better write out what I hope to do with ¬†myself in 2013.

These goals are largely to help me motivate myself against the reigning monotony of everyday work-life. Before I go any further, I had a moment this morning after reading a damn, fine passage in “Boy’s Life” (on break at work, of course), where I saw myself growing old behind these cubicle walls. It’s not exactly a revelation, but more of a fact at this point. We need money to survive and I do love my job. So, if I’m going to be sitting enclosed by gray fabric walls for the next couple decades, I might as well have fun doing what I love outside of work, and also step up my game while behind those crushing gray plates.

Goal number one: Write more. As a personal hobby, writing has become less and less a part of my life in the past five years. That changed a bit in 2012, as you’ll notice from the blog, but I want to write a bit more seriously. And, I’ve given up on the novel for the time being. I’m called to the short story form, and that’s OK. I’m not in it for money, prestige, or fame, so the short story vehicle works for me and my voice. I’ll stick to it and write more often.

Goal number two: Exercise. As I mentioned, I have the newness of 2013 coating me right now. I’m feeling newborn alive, screaming and wailing against the very things that oppress me. That and I’m fat. I went to the gym two years ago and cut 20 pounds. I’ve re-upped my subscription to a gym closer to home and cheaper by $10 a month. It’s on. Going to start on the 1st. Goal is to workout three times a week.

Goal number three: Quit smoking. Some of you may not know this, but I’ve struggled with smoking for the better part of the last five years. I’ve quit numerous times, only to return to the dark habit out of fear, loathing, you name it. 2013 is going to be different. I shall quit the thundersticks once and for all. Boom.

Goal number four: Read more novels. I did decent this year. Che and I stripped television out of our lives like a deadbeat tenant who was behind six months on rent. I only watch the occasional television show nowadays, clocking less than five hours a week in front of the glowing god. In it’s place, I’ve read a few books this year. I really want to step it up. I’m going to try for 36 books this year. I’ll be doing the Goodread’s challenge, so you can check up on that goal if you so desire.

Learn a programming language, you damn ape!

Learn a programming language, you damn ape!

Goal number five: Learn a programming language (python or PHP). I don’t have to be expert status on this by 2014, but workable understanding would be good.

Goal number six: Enjoy my family and nature. Last year we took our first family camping trip. We headed to Lake Shelbyville and had a heck of a time, save for the nasty lake virus Aleah brought home. This year I would like to camp in Tennessee for a weekend, a few state parks, and just have a good time with my wife and daughter.